Conflict on my mind, death in my heart…

Ive been reading and reading the news almost incessantly the last couple of days. Along with watching it, and thinking about. There is a lot going on in the world. It’s strange that a lot of the time i feel so affected by things going on miles and miles away, yet at the same time i feel so disengaged from reality. Not my own, but the worlds reality. So i guess, in a sense i feel disengaged from OUR reality. Everyone on this planet is interconnected,  so different, yet no different at all.

I say this because for me at least, watching these things unfold, feels personal to me. other peoples suffering has always gotten to, or should i say affected me.  Now, that doesn’t make me a great person, it just makes me someone who feels something. Like, i was reading and watching all of the major news coverage on the current Israeli/Gaza conflict and then went throughout the various blogs on here and attached to the NYT, act to see what normal ordinary people thought and there was a very compelling post on here that i think was freshly pressed about it.

What i liked about it was that it was trying to be as objective as possible. Why is that such a big thing? I think it’s a big thing, because the worse situations get, the more highlighted the become, the harder it is to stay objective and the fact of the matter is we all have prejudices. We’d all like to think that we don’t, and that we value everyone equally, and that we treat people of all ethnicities, ages, religions, social status and intellect in the same way but we don’t. So seeing someone try and stick solely to the facts of what was going on in the conflict right now and using the facts of that conflicts past was refreshing to say the least.

But then everyone was arguing, (not debating) in the comments session and it got extremely heated for an online ‘discussion’ and words like anti-semitism and zionists were thrown around. It was just so achingly frustrating and mind-numbing because all rationale had gone out the window, yet i could still understand why both sides were overtly emotional about the many issues surrounding the conflict because it is an emotional subject. People are dying and that is not ok and trying to remove the politics from the situation won’t work and although using what facts we do have to make rational decisions about it would be fine, but we can’t. We all have opinions on everything and even if the aren’t the truth, they are truth and that is our problem, their problem and the worlds problem, and it drives me fucking nuts.

Another issue thats been bothering me so much as of late, is all the new pro-buissness attention that africa has been getting. Not that i don’t want them to prosper or flourish, but i do have a problem with other countries constantly exploiting the plight of the people, using pro-US and pro-buissness presidents and politicians in the region, so that they can make a very tidy profit. What I’ve always had a problem in believing is that everyone just wants everyone to do well, because that is just not true. Africa has been continuously exploited over the course of history, conflicts have been instigated, there people have been slaves, and the natural resources stolen and every decade it becomes easier for the thing that makes africa valuable, its natural resources to be taken, while the people of the continent live in poverty, or immigrate to the countries that exploit it, where many are undocumented, only to be harassed for taking jobs from the people of which country they have immigrated to. Yet if these major corporations, that represent the interests of their heads, and the country in which their business originates, in turn creating jobs for their people and making the CEO’s and the taxman from wherever they are from extremely rich. It just bothers me. I would just love for one second, if an african leader did what was best for their constituency, rather than line their pockets and represent the interests of others, namely china, india, brazil and the US.

Another thing that has been bothering me later is that america is increasing its influence in Asia, half way around the world, primarily in Vietnam, (oh, the irony), to combat Chinas growing presence. It always baffles me how America goes one way and then just does a double turn. They insisted and opened China, wanted it to be more friendly to the western world and their interests and also for their ties to the former Soviet Union to fizzle slowly. Which worked and now they really don’t like it.

Why? Because the American dream doesn’t exist. It doesn’t. Why do i believe that? Because now that China has served it’s purpose and is expanding and gaining great political influence around the world and is steadily developing as major economy, it’s a threat to the US stronghold, on well everything. Everyone does say that the white house is the most important office in the world, and how many of you who are not American followed the election? So we can’t have that change. Oh no, that is just so bad, China is doing a little to well. It’s becoming self-reliant. Where Japan seems to be forgotten, even though it is a strong US ally, even though the US dropped an ATOMIC BOMB on them. If that is NOT a war crime, i have no idea what is.  I mean, the irony,  It just drives me nuts. (Yeah, i said it again.)

It just bothers me, and makes me unable to sleep at night, everything that is going on in the world. It seems as though none cares unless something is in it for good. That is what troubles me, because good i don’t believe in. What i believe in, is that greed, jealousy and power are the strongest of motivators and that normal people around the world will continue to suffer for that,  because that is human nature.

But then again, who am i to revel or live in other peoples suffering. I’m breathing, I’m as healthy as i can be, I’m young and I’m safe, (whatever that means) and i guess that is all that matters and i appreciate it.

But i still haven’t slept,

and i feel like i won’t be sleeping at all for a while.

This disaster, this hell, this cage is one in which we have created for ourselves.

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